50 States, 52 weeks: The Beginning

goals, travel 2 Minutes

Somewhat recently I was released from an abusive relationship. While primarily it was verbal and emotional, it left me a hallowed out version of myself. I was unable to recognize anything when I looked in the mirror. The worst part was the longer I stayed the more I became like the abuser, my empty parts being filled with rage and fear to match his. Rage and fear I couldn’t seem to escape, making me feel lost and dizzy. It was all-encompassing. I lived for a long time in a fog of self-hatred and confusion. I disappeared from many people’s lives and those who spent time with me didn’t know this person I had become.  It’s hard to imagine those times now that I’m making my way back to me. Once you’re out of the darkness it’s hard to remember how it feels to live without hope. I’m glad to be working my way back to “normal” Johanna and I have since recognized life is all about learning. I’m just hoping I’ve gained the strength to GO before the worst happens in the future because oh how my intuition screamed GO back then. I just hadn’t learned to listen yet.

This experience has changed me. I am not quite as carefree as I once was. Smiling is difficult and I feel like there may be a part of me that might never heal 100%. The one thing that has gotten me out of my self-imposed downward spiral is the planning of an adventure. After spending so long living life as a zombie, I needed to run free again.  This decision was made on a plane ride back to my mother’s home during a very low period. My world felt like a dark pit and I couldn’t continue. I had become so dependent on the relationship and the criticism that I didn’t have the strength or confidence to crawl out, let alone walk away. I didn’t know how to get out of my own head. Then an idea arose and I knew I needed this escape to be real. 50 states in 52 weeks. I started a job as a flight attendant the year prior and hadn’t quite traveled as I originally planned. There was no one to tie me down anymore, no one to make me feel guilty and I didn’t know where I wanted to live in the world anyway, so why not visit every state in one year and see if anything sticks?

This is where the good part begins. I started talking about my #50in52 and people loved the idea. They also loved telling me what to do in their state and I LOVE to listen. I will be blogging the adventure and the healing so please, track my progress. Hold me accountable! Most of all, if you’re reading this and you know someplace I HAVE to GO, tell me! It’s not just about stepping foot in every state, it’s about experiencing the best/weirdest/most fun/most interesting things each state has to offer. I’m starting this week, the first week of June (my 29th birthday) and I want to fill the last year of my 20s with as many amazing stories as possible. Even if all you have to share is where I can get the best sandwich I’ve ever tasted… I NEED THAT SANDWICH! So share, tell me where I need to go… Because this time when my intuition is screaming GO, I’m listening. Go Johanna, go! Go everywhere.

Published by gojohannago

In June of 2015 I began the journey of visiting all 50 states in 52 weeks. My travel goal for the last year in my 20's. I finished in June 2016 and now I am working on sharing my story and adventures.

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32 thoughts on “50 States, 52 weeks: The Beginning”

  1. Wow! I love this. I feel like you read my mind. I can relate so much. I have a face to face interview with Delta next week! I’m hoping I get the job because I feel it will help me experience the world more and maybe I too can find my place in it. Who knows we may bump into each other one of these days! Hope all goes well for you! xoxo

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    1. That is so exciting, congrats! You will have to let me know how it goes. My advice for people going through the hiring process is always to just be themselves, have fun, enjoy the process because it can be loooong 🙂 the job is definitely a lifestyle and I wouldn’t change it for the world because it fits me so perfectly right now. I’m off to work as I type! Good luck this week and I can’t wait to hear how it goes!

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        1. YAY! How wonderful! Congratulations! This really is a wonderful career and lifestyle. Please let me know if you ever get annoyed during training and just need to vent! I get it 🙂 I can’t wait to hear all about it and hear as you start your new career. Maybe you’ll have to meet me out and about while we are both traveling the globe! 🙂

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  2. Johanna,
    What a great adventure you are about to start out on! I’m going to add my own little bit of advice to the other wisdom I see here and say that I would stay away from the traditional places that you will be tempted to stop. For example, when you come here to California, stay away from San Francisco and LA and even the city I call home and love so much, San Diego. Instead, look for the gems that most people don’t know about – hike a bit of the Pacific Crest Trail and take in a breathtaking view of the mountains, drive along California State Route One in the Central Coast by Big Sur and see the beautiful coast or sit among the giants in Big Basin Redwood State Park and feel sweet seclusion. There are two reasons I make these suggestions: One is that you are young and there will come a time in your life when you have a family and you will travel with them. But those will be Disney trips to LA and Orlando, or to visit the Golden Gate Bridge in San Francisco, so you will eventually have opportunities to see those places. The other is that this is the perfect time to have a visit places away from the maddening crowds; to see places that invoke thought and give you time to think, to meet people who will be willing to sit and have conversations, something you will be less likely to find in the typical touristy places (although not impossible to do anywhere.) This trip has the opportunity to be about discovery who you really are inside – and what our country really is inside. Have the most amazing trip!!

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    1. Your insight is perfect and much appreciated. I am looking forward to getting off the beaten path and find little parts of myself and the country I haven’t discovered yet! Thank you so much. I can’t wait to see all the things you have spoken about!

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  3. I just stumbled upon your blog and I’m so intrigued!! I’ve always wanted to travel around the states and can’t wait to follow your adventure. I hope you find peace and self love somewhere on the way cause you seem like an amazing woman! Good luck and safe travels 🙂

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    1. I’m so glad you stumbled your way here! I appreciate your support and compliment. I hope you will be able to begin your own US states adventure someday and enjoy following mine! ❤

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  5. Jo! #50in52 is going to change your life. Better yet, your courage will help to change the life of others. I am so proud of you for speaking out, taking control and inverting that downward spiral. Love and hugs to you! -akoile

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  6. What a wonderful thing you are doing. I wish you all the luck in the world, and especially in each state during your most excellent adventure. I’ve signed up to follow your progress. I’m looking forward to reading all about it. (I’m Julie White and Jenny Hutchinson’s mother.)

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  7. What a wonderful way to heal and rediscover the Wonderful you! I wish you all the best in your adventure! Can’t wait to read all about it! Travel safely and embrace the best in those you meet.

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  8. Dearest Johanna. What an undertaking. You are so strong. You are adventurous. I have no doubt you will accomplish this goal of yours. Have fun. Learn something new every day. Don’t be too afraid but do be cautious. Don’t let anyone take away the glitter you spread everywhere you go!!

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  10. Godspeed, Johanna. I’m Bill Koile’s sister, Lynn. Sheryl told me about the seed of your trip. Be careful out there. “Don’t talk to creeps,” is something I have always told my own world traveling children.

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    1. I was just going to say … You have to visit Santa Rosa Beach when you go to Florida … funny that I found you here, Aunt Lynn.

      Also, Aunt Lynn gave me the best advice about travel: pack 1/2 the stuff and twice the $$! It’s a no-fail formula. And yes, stay away from the creeps, but most people are truly good and want to help you get to where you are going.

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    2. Thank you, Lynn! I am very sure my mom and all my Aunt’s and Uncles will agree with your advice 🙂 I promise to only talk to the creeps who seem like the good kind who just have a great story to tell!

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  11. Go Jo Go!!
    Love this – and love your #50in52!

    Your stories will be amazing motivation for so many… I personally started a lot of my travel once getting out of a bad relationship too – so your tale of healing really resonates.

    Super excited to be watching this from the start and having you share on Girls Who Travel! xox

    http://www.facebook.com/groups/girlswhotravel/

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    1. Thanks Mashy! If you feel like joining me on an adventure, you let me know! I will be doing a California roadtrip at some point as well so hopefully I can see you then!

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    2. I think this is a really amazing way to break free from everything that was binding you. Congrats on embracing the future! Xoxo! And the stuff to do in UT totally changes with the seasons so msg me when you are honing in! 😉

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      1. Thank you! I will absolutely be reaching out! I have heard a couple different things for UT so far. Salt Lake City and Moab. As I figure out when I’ll be there I will reach out for the advice!

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